ISSUE 100
too.
AO: Yeah, the process of accepting and loving yourself is the most important thing. If you can do that and find people who support that, it's amazing what will happen when you get to a place where you truly do love and accept yourself. People will turn around and things they might be challenging and the road might be a bit rocky - but they will get better.
GC: Dee, the hardest part of coming out for you was finding acceptance within the gay community. You struggled with finding your place, right?
DR: Yeah, when I first came out it was weird. I would go to the clubs and have on a turtle neck and jeans, and I felt like I wasn't hard enough to be butch, and then I wasn't soft enough to be femme. So I'd go and felt ignored - and like I needed to identify a certain way. Other women I met who were like me were different on the gender identity spectrum, I think the community is more open to this idea that we don't have to check a box, we don't have to create these binary roles from hetero culture, and so that for me was an opening experience. I've met a lot of women along the way who feel free to express themselves however is authentic for them, and that's what I had to discover and what Alike, in this movie, comes to discover.
GC: So you don't believe in labels, and neither does Alike. DR: No, no. This film is about not checking a box and not having a label. To the extent that someone identifies and feels a certain way, absolutely feel free to call yourself whatever is true for you, but it's also OK not to.
GC: How did Dee's coming out experience inform your character, Adepero?
AO: We just talked. She made it very clear that anything I had on my mind I could ask her. I asked a whole bunch of questions and she was very awesome at answering and talking about things that, I don't know, might not have been super comfortable (both laugh). But I never got that sense, because I just kept on asking! Doing that developed this relationship based on trust, which allowed me to go to places that aren't necessarily the most comfortable as an actor and just as a person.
GC: What question made you most uncomfortable, Dee? DR: (Both laugh) I don't remember. Oh god. I think, you know, we talked about Alike's level of sexual experience and that Alike is a virgin and how she might be feeling and I don't know there was nothing that was totally uncomfortable. I mean, as an actress I'm asking her to do something that's very uncomfortable. It's probably more uncomfortable to do Continued on Page 47►
GayCalgary Magazine #100, February 2012